What I Learned When My First Homeschooler Graduated

As we approach the last day of school, I find myself reflecting on more than just this past school year. We’ve homeschooled from the beginning, and this is the year my eldest graduates. For better or worse, she’s done with “my” school and ready to move on.

Did I do enough to prepare her? Did I teach the most important things? Will she remember her school years fondly?

These questions come from the quiet part of homeschooling—the fears that come with carrying the weight of both raising our children and being responsible for their education. 

As if mom-guilt needed extra fuel.

I still have three more kids following behind my graduate. The answers to my questions matter for them, because the oldest children are, by default, the “practice” child.

And I don’t have all the answers. 

I don’t know if she’ll look back fondly. I don’t know if she knows everything she needs to know. I don’t know if I did enough. The answer to most of these questions is, honestly, probably not. And that’s why we are often so scared in the quiet night-time hours. Because we know, deep down, that we can’t give them everything they need. 

We can’t do enough.

But here’s what else I know. I know my daughter knows she’s loved. I know she’s got a great sense of curiosity, and that she’ll go looking for the answers she needs. I know that I’ve made mistakes, but that she knows that I see them, too–and that matters…you know?

We can’t fully prepare them for life. Not with homeschooling. Not with brick-and-mortar schooling. We can teach them how to keep learning. We can model that. We can show them that we are still learning, too–new facts, how to fix things, and we continue to build and refine our own characters.

Sometimes, as homeschoolers, we forget that we are not doing a job that has an end date. Just because our children graduate from high school doesn’t mean that they’re “baked” like a cake. They aren’t done “cooking” yet. They can still learn and grow after they’ve received their diploma.

And hopefully, the years of time and relationship we’ve built with them will allow us to continue to speak into their lives, guiding and supporting them as they go. 

So, did I teach the most important things? 

If she knows she’s loved and is grounded by her faith, if she knows how to keep learning and she prioritizes loving others, then the answer is yes–the most important things are taken care of.

After all, we’re raising humans, not robots.